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The Un-Used Uterus

Today, I'm going to talk about my uterus. My un-filled uterus. The uterus that has housed and nourished 3 tiny bodies to full gestation. It is now a vacant lot.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I want to be pregnant now nor constantly neither. However, I will be frank here, because that is all I know how to be. I want a baby. My youngest is getting big and preparing for school. I am entering my 30's and the clock is now having a resounding gong-like sound to its ticking. I don't have as much time as I used to.

Realistically having a baby now would be difficult. And honestly, if I were a single mom again there would be no way I would even consider it. The reasons for wanting another baby, I understand, are purely selfish.

My three pregnancies were encircled with scandal and drama. An affair was doomed to occur every time the stick turned pink. I was constantly in fear of losing my then husband, or my the baby due to the stress. Constantly doubting my worth. …

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