You Best Back Up
Being a single mom does not come without its challenges. Granted some of us tend to handle it differently. Some of us resent it, others embrace it. Others white knuckle it. Still some hold the responsibility of it as a badge of honor.
I try to carry myself with an equal balance. I sometimes resent that I am doing this all alone. I sometimes white knuckle through stages and phases. I try to embrace it and I do see this calling as a badge of honor and not something to be ashamed of.
So I'm not married. So I am young. So I do have 3 kids under the age of 8. SO FREAKIN WHAT!! It's not an easy task but I chose this life. I walk the line between psychiatric patient and Martha Fucking Stewart daily. I don't have time to sit and analyze what people may or may not think of my parenting when my 2 year old throws herself on the floor in a tantrum in the middle of the grocery store. I can't drop what I'm doing and take a poll of my parenting skills from the random remix of 'King of the Hill' cast rejects and Disney Character T-shirt wearing populous at Wal-Mart.
Now that may all sound harsh. I can hear the unison chant of, "WTF, Mel what do you have against Wal-Mart."
No, I'm kidding, Wal-Mart is awesome. The people in it, however, make me want to shank a singing purple dinosaur.
Let me take you down my wonderful journey in the Wal-Mart. I go there in the early afternoon. Birds chirping, children skipping, automatic doors opening. When my midget entourage and I arrive. We had just got done with a wonderful morning of dinosaur park fun and our bellies were full of McDonald's goodness. Children were ready for a nap, but it was our last stop before we had to go home and me being the stubborn beast that I am convinced myself we could run in and out with no melt downs.
Feeling successful in my quest, I went to the register to check out. So far so good. Everyone seems fine. Spirits are high as we anticipate our exit and then the inevitable fight ensued. Karter wanted to ride on the cart and Kelton wanted the same spot. I saw our car through the once pleasant automatic doors and decided to not stop just mediate a compromise as we rolled through the parking lot. Of course, my plan failed. As my daughter stubbornly won't give up her spot and my equally stubborn son won't quite asking for it. They both push each other off the cart. Thankfully we where still on the side walk when they decided to go fist to cuffs. As I'm pulling the two of them away from each other and calming the situation down. A woman out of no where comes up and hands me a flyer about parenting classes.
It took everything in me not to go ghetto white girl scrappy on her. Well, that and the fact that she was at least a foot taller than me, led me to hold my rage inside. But I gave her a harsh look... O she knew...
What is with people thinking that they need to butt in and help parent random children that aren't theirs. Or worse make the parent feel like they are doing an inadequate job. If our kid is misbehaving there is no white flag that we raise up saying we surrender our parenting right, someone else come handle this. These 'parenting vigilantes' as well intentioned as they might be, do not know the situation or the family dynamic that is going on. And when you are doing the parenting on your own, as much as we love help, we don't love a stranger showing us "how it's done."
Thanks but no thank you. Keep your second chance parenting dreams to yourself.