My Love Triangle... SMH!
Don't judge me too harshly, but I am currently involved in a love triangle. Yes, yours truly is in the midst of a three way catastrophe and I honestly am at a loss of what to do. I never wanted it to get to this point but things happen. Emotions get entangled and soon what was only suppose to be a casual thing turns into a serious relationship. I just don't know who to pick!
Thankfully, they haven't asked me to choose, and they never will. My ongoing love affair is with 2 of the most unselfish things in my possession. My fridge and my Netflix. There's no easy way of saying this but... I love them both.
My fridge is always there for me, filled with life sustaining goodness. Holds my wine, chills my chocolate, and reminds me of what goodness in life is. Sometimes, its side by side doors will hug me tight and its defrost reverberation lets me know everything is going to be O.K.
My Netflix always predicts exactly what I want. Streaming its cinematic goodness straight to my heart. It talks to me in romantic comedy and role plays in action flicks. I cry with it, laugh with it, and get pissed at it. I yell, talk, and warn it of the person hiding in the closet. It automatically will start my next episode in my addiction and does so without judgement. It talks to me until I fall asleep and always has new releases in it's life to share with me.
They both are great with kids. My fridge holds their juice boxes and snacks. And Netflix is willing to entertain them when I need an hour to get things done around the house.They both have such great qualities, you can see why there is such a dilemma. So I believe I will just ride this love triangle out. As long as I keep one in the kitchen and the other in the living room they are none-the-wiser of each other.
Now to be serious. Dating as a single mom is the most confusing and disappointing thing to deal with. To go along with bar rats that make going to the pub their usual weekend agenda and the degenerates and potential pedophiles lurking on online dating sites, it is slim pickin's for us single mamas. And once you do the exhausting task of weeding out the booze hounds and future amber alerts you get the casual sex assholes and the 'I don't want anything serious' douchebags. WTF? Where are all the fully committed gentlemen. Look if you're out there flipping me off and thinking hey some of us just want our skittle dittled, I get it. Everything I'm writing is purely me and what I want out of a relationship now. I know what its like to mean nothing more than a scratch to be itched and I know what it is like to be with someone you genuinely want. I prefer the genuineness. I'm ready for the genuineness.
It is discouraging though,when I put myself out there and 9 times out of 10 the moment I mention my lolly pop guild they are checking their watches and rethinking their decision to get my number. I get it. 3 kids are a lot for anyone to commit to when you share absolutely no DNA with them. And when thinking of starting a relationship with a single mother the kids are a huge consideration, not just for the guy but for the mother as well. After all, we are the guardians of our childrens' hearts. I just have to put this out there though to all you single men out there. Is your mental picture of how you want your life to go, keeping you from the happiness that is right in front of you? A single mom may not be everyone's cup of tea and that's fine. Just don't count us single mom's out of your relationship constituents because its not what you had in mind. In this life I have learned that you rarely get out of life what you plan. If everything went as planned I would still be married, adultery would have never been an issue, and my kids would never utter the 'where is daddy' question. But here I am, single, drinking wine, writing a blog and questioning whether or not it is time to start on my cat collection and to sew my vagina up for good.
Single mom's can love deeply and fully when it is the right person. The person who accepts her fully. Because if a man can't appreciate everything about you then he deserves none of you. Being a mom is forever, the minute the stick turned pink your life was no longer about you. So finding the right man is going to have the same kind of aspect. If they aren't right for your kids then they aren't right for you. There'll be someone for you, I'm not holding my breathe for my mister right, but I know I will always have my fridge and my Netflix to keep me company. For you fellow single mamas, hope of another chance is just a matter of keeping your spark alive and not collecting cats.