I love to write and its no secret that I write pretty truthfully that in some instances it can hurt feelings. I in no way am writing to purposefully hurt anyone...sometimes the truth can damage more than a lie. But I would rather type truthfully than lie for comfort. It's time to break out of my cocoon and challenge myself to step out in bravery. I can sit and cry through my situations behind closed doors so that the risk of offending someone would be lessened but I am trying this whole new thing were I put myself and my children first and everyone else at a close second. Call it selfish but that's how I'm gonna roll. I imagine there will be several people that will be upset, disappointed, and down right pissed off at what I share, but I'm pretty sure those are the same people that live behind fogged glass and hate that I still suck air so I will just share a blanket apology to all those and keep on keepin' on with what I want to do..I'm sure I'll piss them off in other ways anyways. In the words of Jason Mraz 'I won't worry my life away'.
I am going to become a beautiful scarred woman this New Year. A beautiful mess that seeks only validation from herself. Who says what she wants and sets goals that she conquers. I am starting anew. I am going to drink wine and dance freely in my kitchen. I am going to sing into a hair brush and engulf my children in my love. I am going to live my life like no one is watching, except for my kiddos. I am going to embody a happiness that has been denied to me for so many years. I am going to teach my children that normalcy is whatever you define it as. I will refuse to water myself down to expand my pond for dating. I am going to be a beautiful remix of 'why Georgia', 'Meet Virginia', and 'the color of love'. I will give, help, share, and love freely and without contempt. I am going to blossom into who I have been holding back from becoming, in fear of offending anyone. Now, it's my turn.